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Monday, September 7, 2015

Just Maybe

Maybe suicide isn't the side effect of life, 
Maybe suicide is the side effect of pain.

Maybe a smile isn't the side effect of happiness,
Maybe a smile is the side effect of pain.

Maybe tears aren't the side effect of pain,
Maybe tears are the side effect of happiness.

Maybe tears are the ones that heal us,
Maybe smiles are the ones that hurt us.

***


Hi Guys,

I love quotes so much, maybe that's because they usually reassure me that I'm not crazy. That my thoughts, my fears and doubts are normal. Poetry started to inspire me as well this summer. It doesn't always have to rhyme, I just enjoy when it makes me feel like "yes, exactly. This is so true, this is what I needed to read". Such feelings make me feel so peaceful. 
I wrote this poem in August 2014. The words "side effect" have been inspired by The Fault In Our Stars - the book I read that summer. The poem is about suicide, because that's what happened to someone I know. He always seemed such a happy person, but his last string broke. This is about him and many people who hide behind a smile and aren't actually happy at all. I hope you like it. If I write other poems, I'm going to post them as well. 

Love,

Miss Cherry xo

Friday, September 4, 2015

Paper Towns

Hi Guys!

I finally went to see Paper Towns! I read the book in July and I only remembered the highlights of the story, so I hope my opinion will be rational.First of all, around 70% of the book consists of Q looking for Margo. While reading, I must admit I got bored sometimes, because he kept on looking for clues, but he couldn't find anything. However, it fascinated me how devoted he was to find her - a girl he barely knew, a girl who was mean to him and only needed him when everything went wrong. The movie was different. It went fast, he kept on finding clues so easily, he barely did an effort. The disappointing part is that the viewer didn't even receive the chance to think where the clues and Margo might be. The clues showed up on the screen and a few seconds later Q found them. So that was a malus to me.
Another thing I'd like to mention, is that I enjoyed the quiet shout-out to The Fault In Our Stars. When I saw the trailer for the first time, the presence of Nat Wolff surprised me, but in a good way. He isn't a steaming hot model, but that's a good thing to me, it made the story more real. His dorky facial expressions completed the whole story. That's exactly what the actor to play this role needed to be. A dorky person, who has absolutely no experience with girls and expresses his love in the most unpredictable ways with words no one would use. That's why I like him. Nat Wolff, you go Nat Wolff! 
But the most surprising scene was Ansel Elgort showing up as the cashier. It was a woman in the book, wasn't it? Whoever thought of putting him into the movie for less than 10 seconds knows how to do his job correctly!


Cara Delevingne. She deserves her own paragraph. What can I say? I'm positively surprised. Cara Delevingne seemed to me a model like every other. And models were in my head girls who were rich because of their body, while their brains were on level -23 of intelligence. I had quite a bad opinion about models. I don't know why. Just like football players. Many people see them as gods, but I feel like they became football players, because they weren't smart. Even my math teacher told us once : "There are men who fall for women for their legs and there are women who fall for men for their legs, but most of the time they fall for each other". He was talking about football players and models. 

But let's come back to the point - Cara Delevingne was a stranger to me. All I knew about her was that she became popular all of a sudden by being a hot model, who uses drugs and has a list with everyone she had sex with and puts scores on their performances. So yeah, no big wonder that she had a bad reputation. But let's forget that for a moment. I wonder if being famous involves playing a role most of the time? That might be the case to have some privacy. One way or another, she played her role quite well. I don't know what the standards are, but she played the perfect role. She had to be hot, mysterious and rebellious. She is all of it in real life. I think she made a good decision by doing something else than only modelling. I always saw her looking stunning on red carpets, but this time I saw her being a normal girl. She wore oversized hoodies, skinny jeans and sneakers. She didn't wear make-up that made her look like a goddess. She was a casual girl and thank to the movie and the close-ups we can see that she's a girl like every single one of us. Maybe one of those girls who prefer adrenaline pumping through her veins, but she's just a human being. I believe she's a normal girl. 


Emotions. The book made me think a lot. There were many quotes I loved reading over and over again. However, the movie didn't contain most of them. The emotions weren't strong enough in the movie. The funny parts made me laugh and they involved Ben most of the time. However, after Margo and Q's magical night, the emotions kind of left. I didn't feel how much Q cared about her. Like I said before, it seemed an easy thing to find Margo or at least much easier than in the book. I know a movie can't be 3 hours long, but to me the scenes didn't reflect enough how Q felt on the inside. When he stayed alone in Agloe, the scenes expressed more emotions. The close-ups, the abandoned place. It proved the emptiness inside Q. But then he went to buy a bus ticket back to Orlando and afterwards he finally found Margo, but it wasn't emotional at all. I would prefer her to be cold-hearted to him and him becoming frustrated in a more intense way. She could start telling him how selfish he is because he only looks at the story through his own eyes, he sees it as running after a girl he loves, but he doesn't care she wants to find out who she is. She wants to define herself again and start all over again in a place where no one knows her. He could become even more frustrated because she called him selfish while he drove for 20 hours to find her, because he was worried about her. I would prefer to see a well built-up argument that ends up in frustration. So he has his ticket to go back and at that certain time she waits at him to talk things out and thank him for caring about her and they could simply end it with a hug, not a kiss. I think that was SO Hollywood. I preferred the platonic love in the book, where two lost souls try to understand this complicated world and their feelings.


So in general I would say, it was an easy movie to watch. I didn't have to think too much, it was more an adventure than a love story. It was nice to watch new actors prove their worth. There were funny moments, it wasn't sad at all. It didn't have any depth to me, which I usually don't enjoy. I probably won't re-watch it multiple times. The book was better, there were so many beautiful quotes in it. If I had to score the movie, I'd probably give it a 6 out of 10. The cast did a good job, the script was slightly too simple to me. Thank you, John Green for being such a talented man who knows how to put feelings into words in a beautiful way. Sometimes it goes a little far, which makes me think and wonder if I interpret them correctly, but keep on doing this. That's the depth I need while discovering new stories. 

I wanted to add some quotes that I enjoyed the most, but they aren't all on WeHeartIt, so I'll just write them down

♥︎ "The smell leaves me seized by desperate panic - panic not like my lungs are out of air, but like the atmosphere itself is out of air. I think maybe the reason I have spent most of my life being afraid is that I have been trying to prepare myself, to train my body for the real fear when it comes. But I am not prepared."

♥︎ "The conclusion seemed inescapable. Even with everything broken and decided inside her, she couldn't quite allow herself to disappear for good. And she had decided to leave her body - to leave it for me - in a shadow version of our subdivision, where her first strings had broken."

♥︎ "This is the value of our souvenirs, I think: you can't give this shit away."

♥︎ "Did you know that for pretty much the entire history of the human species, the average life span was less than 30 years? You could count on ten years or so of real adulthood, right? There was no planning for retirement. There was no planning for a career. There was no planning. No time for planning. No time for a future. But then the life spans started getting longer, and people started having more and more future, and so they spent more time thinking about it. About the future. And now life has become the future. Every moment of your life is lived for the future - you go to high school so you can go to college so you can get a good job so you can get a nice house so you can afford to send your kids to college so they can get a good job so they can get a nice house so they can afford to send their kids to college."

♥︎ "Maybe she deserved to be forgotten. But at any rate, I couldn't forget her."

♥︎ "Talking to a drunk person was like talking to an extremely happy, severely brain-damaged three-year-old."

♥︎ "This image seemed too sad to be true - it all struck me as so lonely and so unMargo. But all the evidence of the past ten days accumulated toward a surprising conclusion : Margo herself was - at least part of the time - very unMargo." 

♥︎ "I felt so detached from all this shit, all this high-school-is-ending-so-we-have-to-reveal-that-deep-down-we-all-love-everybody bullshit." 

♥︎ "And I could picture her again : she unravels the carpet halfway each night so het hip isn't against bare concrete as she lies on her side. She crawls beneath the blanket, uses the rest of the carpet as a pillow, and sleeps. But why here ? How is this better than home ? And if it's so great, why leave ? These are the things I cannot imagine, and I realise that I cannot imagine them because I didn't know Margo. I knew how she smelled, and I knew how she acted in front of me, and I knew how she acted in front of others, and I knew that she liked Mountain Dew and adventure and dramatic gestures, and I knew that she was funny and smart and just generally more than the rest of us. But I didn't know what brought her here, or what kept her here, or what made her leave. I didn't know why she owned thousands of records but never told anyone she even liked music. I didn't know what she did at night, with her shades down, with her door locked, in the sealed privacy of her room.
And maybe this was what I needed to do above all. I needed to discover what Margo was like when she wasn't being Margo."


♥︎ "The longer I do my job," he said, "the more I realise that humans lack good mirrors. It's so hard for anyone to show us how we look, and so hard for us to show anyone how we feel."
(...) "But isn't it also that on some fundamental level we find it difficult to understand that the other people are human beings in the same way that we are ? We idealise them as gods or dismiss them as animals.
(...) I was sitting back. I was listening. And I was hearing something about her about windows and mirrors. Chuck parson was a person. Like me. Margo Roth Spiegelman was a person, too. And I had never quite thought of her that way, not really; it was a failure of all my precious imaginings. All along - not only since she left, but for a decade before - I had been imagining her without listening, without knowing that she made as poor a window as I did. And so I could not imagine her as a person who could feel fear, who could feel isolated in a roomful of people, who could be shy about her record collection because it was too personal to share. Someone who might read travel books to escape to. Someone who - because no one thought she was a person - had no one to really talk to.
And all at once I knew how Margo Roth Spiegelman felt when she wasn't being Margo Roth Spiegelman: she felt empty. She felt the unscaleable wall surrounding her. I thought of her asleep on the carpet with only that jagged silver of sky above her. Maybe Margo felt comfortable there because Margo the person lived like that all the time : in an abandoned room with blocked-out windows, the only light pouring in through holes in the roof. Yes. The fundamental mistake I had always made - and that she had, in fairness, always led me to make - was this : Margo was not a miracle. She was not an adventure. She was not a fine and precious thing. She was a girl."

♥︎ "That was perfect, I thought : you listen to people so that you can imagine them, and you hear all the terrible and wonderful things people do to themselves and to one another, but in the end the listening exposed you more than it exposes the people you're trying to listen to."






Love,



MissCherry xo